To tell u the truth ,i enjoyed it..being a houseman who ur MO and specialist can trust u ,is a bonus
I may have learn something from every posting..
But i keep on losing my foods for my soul..
Not being able to attend all tarbiyah programme,
Not being able to have my own "anak usrah"
And sadly but true ,not being able to read mathurat everyday,reading al quran,
Qiam,and doing dakwah to my colleagues and pt..
And thats very sad..
I can feel the difference..during my time in 1st poster and now as a 5th poster..
How can this years changing me??!!!
I guess because of my ignorance..not because of my murabbi..
Sometimes, i keep on searching my long lost soul..only bits and pieces left..
When reading al-quran, it tried to feel it..but it wasnt there..
Probably because of my heart is too sick..
I tend to heal my patient ..but in the end I let my soul sick and die as well..
Being a senior Houseman,makes me think a lot..
What am i gonna do when im becoming a MO later..
Which fields im gonna pursue in..
Though some MO offers me to join their department..but i still have to make a right decision..
*sigh
Though its my carrier decision,being somebody in DnT will always make u think twice for ur DnT pathway as well..
Well , i guess its time for me to wake up from deep sleep,
To get out from this comfort zone,
To avoid all those things which keep me away from HIM ,my Rabb
For some people,i may looks happy..but deep inside i feel empty..
Without dakwah and tarbiyah ,it feels like a desert..empty and lifeless one
DnT always be my foods,my happiness..
And now i have to open a new chapter..start from scratch..
May Allah ease and bring me back ..amin
